9/11 – never forget.

September 14, 2013Leave a comment

We had the privilege of living in the Big Apple for 3 years, October 2001-December 2004.

Those are years we will never forget.

In July of 2001, we skipped our way into New York City, with happy hearts and anxious anticipation. We were interviewing for a youth and young adult pastorate position at what was to become our home church ~ Glad Tidings Tabernacle, in the heart of midtown Manhattan.

(Photo credit: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Glad-Tidings-Tabernacle-33rd-Street-NYC/253046548057077?sk=photos_stream)

We left NYC that week in July, ready for a new start and for closure back home.
Boo-ya. Hired. Done Deal.
Prior to being hired at Glad Tidings (GTT), we were living and working in Dallas, TX at the Women of Faith and New Life Clinics corporate office(s).

September 11, 2001.
It was my last day of work at Women of Faith, when I received a phone call from my aunt, telling me the news…
Adam rushed home to grab our t.v. He brought it back, plugged it in, and for the rest of the day all eyes in the Women of Faith and New Life offices were glued to the screen.

Has your (new) church been affected?
Are you guys still going to move there?
Are. you. crazy???

Yes. Just crazy enough.

As soon as we could connect with our Pastors, we found out they were okay and the building was okay, and asked – “Do you still want us to come?”
“Yes. We want you to come. Now – more than ever.”

So in October of 2001, we officially, unofficially, became New Yorkers.

…

Nothing stays the same.

The terrorist attacks on the Twin Towers changed everything…
in our lives. in our church. in New York City. in the World.

New Yorkers are fully committed people.
They are committed to their causes, to their communities, and to living amidst constant change.

As New Yorkers, we were fully committed to our cause ~ our call as the Pastors for the Youth and Young Adult communities of GTT.
Our job changed the minute we started working there, and things never slowed up or settled down.
NYC is a ridiculously fast paced, outrageous, obnoxious and lovable city.
It requires flexibility, ingenuity and creativity ~ mixed with a lot of resilience, stubbornness and craziness.
You either love it. Or you hate it.
Sometimes on the same day. Sometimes in the same moment.

9/11 was a day that changed the world.
But Hope still rises from those ashes…
Light still shines in the darkest places…
Life still thrives in the pit of despair…

Nothing stays the same.
Lives were forever changed…
Buildings are built up and buildings eventually come down. Even the original Glad Tidings building, from 1867, was demolished a few years after we moved from NYC…

(Photo credit: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Glad-Tidings-Tabernacle-33rd-Street-NYC/253046548057077?sk=photos_stream)

New Yorkers know how to thrive and survive in the midst of stress and change.

The buildings they frequent for work, home and play are just that. Buildings.

NYC is known as a concrete jungle...

But the buildings don’t make New York City, New York City.

Our lives weren’t changed from visits to the museums, the monuments or the matinee…

Our lives were forever changed because of the people we encountered.

The vibrancy of the people who live, work and play in the Big Apple is what makes New York City, New York City.

It’s the subway train performer, the street corner musician, the deli worker, the diner waitress, the shoe shiner, the fashion designer, the actress, the opera singer, the Broadway star, the business man, the banker, the CEO, the student, the teacher, the preacher…
The people make the city come alive. The people make the city move.
We will never forget 9/11. People around the world will never forget. New Yorkers will never forget. And New Yorkers will keep on moving their city forward.
…

For a few years, we were part of that city movement.
Our time there was an epic part of our life journey.

Our first daughter was born in New York City ~ so she’s an official New Yorker.

Our lives would never be the same after living in NYC, serving at our church in the heart of the city, and becoming parents for the first time…

We learned to trust more intimately.

We learned to love more deeply.

We learned to see more vividly.

We love NYC. We will never forget 9/11. We are so proud to have served God and love His people in NYC.

Here we are with some of the youth and young adults from GTT.

***
How has 9/11 changed your life or world view? How has NYC impacted you? Please share…

In Him, Leslie

summer’s over… suck it up and go back-to-school.

September 5, 2013Leave a comment

ugh. summer’s over.
and now we have to suck it up and go back-to-school.

yep. you knew it was coming…

your tan was fading.
the pool water was draining.
your favorite flip flops were wearing out.
Christmas trees were already on display at the craft store.
the back-to-school Target ad came tumbling into your mailbox, advertising new, hip and fresh ideas on how to use duct tape for every school project and fashion statement.

as the day approached…, i heard rejoicing in the streets of my suburban hood.

parents hooting and hollering – school’s starting again! yay! i get to send my kids out of the house, fully supervised, and even fed, for 6+hours! yee-haw! yipee!

but still.

some were dreading rather than rejoicing…

wishing for one. more. day.

one. more. chance.

even pining for another moment to re-do surviving our family vacation.

so that’s me. the one dreading, with my kids and hubby in full support.

we love summer.

we love our kids being at home.

we miss them during the day.

we rejoice when they return home.

ahhh…another blog, for another time…

as my summer tan was fading a few weeks ago, the kids and i took a trip to Trader Joes.

as we were checking out, the cashier asked me about the kids going back to school.

we chatted for a while, and she posed the question – don’t you wish you could just start over? wipe the slate clean, and start a new?

when her kids were young, she always loved back-to-school because she saw it as a time for a fresh start.

and it can be.

sometimes we just need a do-over.

any-hoo…as this school year started, i was hit over the head with this idea of a fresh start, and our first grader was hit in the head with his pencil box.

yep. you read that right. within the first hours of his first day in first grade, he was hit in the head by his pencil box. because another student threw it at him.

when the school called to share with us this wonderful news, we weren’t surprised. we’d had a feeling.

when my phone rang, i knew it was the school before answering.

am i psychic?

nope, not psychic. just following the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

after finding out salem was doing fine and survived the pencil-box-in-the-head incident, my heart had compassion toward his classmate.

he needs a do-over. a fresh start. a clean slate.

he later apologized, and all was well in the first grade land again.

and salem needed a do-over.

the first half of his first day in first grade was spent in the nurses office.

we were uber-proud of how salem responded.

expressing compassion and understanding with his reaction toward his classmate.

so instead of dreading the school year, i’m asking God for a clean slate.
i’m hoping this year’s gonna be different.
i’m hoping my kids will get ready for school every morning without me screaming at them to put their shoes or pants on. err… i’m hoping i won’t have to scream at them ever again. or tomorrow.
i’m hoping no one else will be hit in the head with their pencil box.
i’m hoping we ~~won’t be late to school~~… oops already was… again.
i’m hoping my kids will love their teachers and tolerate homework.
i’m hoping my kids will shine God’s love even brighter this year.
yep. i’m still drowning in school papers the kids bring home.
my hand hurts from all the required parent signatures…
i’ve already screamed at them to get ready for school…after calmly asking several times.
we’ve already been late to school, so i already need a do-over on that one.
and if i’m asked to volunteer for one. more. thing – i just might flip out.

but i’m hopeful…
with God, there is always opportunity for a fresh start.

so my summer’s over.

i’ve sucked it up and we’ve gone back to school…

and since then, i have reflected on my conversation with the cashier at Trader Joes. i was grateful to have had a few moments to share with her about God as our slate cleaner.

when we have a relationship with Him, we have access to His all sufficient grace and His mercies that are new every morning.

…
are you in need a fresh start? there’s always hope for a clean slate with relationship in Christ Jesus.
i’d love to hear your thoughts, and hear your clean slate stories!

In Him, Leslie

sometimes we need a pastors conference… and sometimes, we just need to fall apart

August 17, 20131 Comment

a few weeks ago we returned from an epic trip, visiting family and enjoying the pacific northwest.

after surviving our family vacation time, we traveled onto the great state of california to visit more family, and attend the national vineyard pastors conference in anaheim.

my heart was full from family time, and my emotions were high with expectation for the conference time awaiting us…

buuuut… after a trip to the beach, my excitement quickly faded…

and i fell apart…

sometimes moms need to fall apart.

disappointment, frustration, and tiredness had all set in.

i could feel it growing inside me while we were at the beach.

i was pissed off while we were at the beach.

the beach was beautiful, the kids and adam were having a blast, but i was melting down internally.

as we were leaving the beach, i slipped and fell flat. on. my. butt.

looking back at the scene, it was funny. (and thankfully i can laugh about it now)

but in that moment, i lost it.

i fell apart.

i wept from the beach all the way to the pastors conference for nearly 2 hours (while we were driving in heavy los angeles traffic, of course).

the kids were asleep, adam didn’t know what to do with me, or how to help me, and all i could do was weep.
a pile of kleenex covered my feet on the floor of the car.

i blew my nose so much, my nose ring fell out.

fall apart. give up. lose control. be selfish. let go.

that’s exactly what i needed to do.

and in that time of weeping and losing it, i found it…

God taught me so much thru the hot tears streaming down my cheeks…

the words i managed to choke out in between sobs, so adam would know i was going to be okay.

i needed the freedom to cry.

and thru those tears, i began to see again.

they washed away my frustration, disappointment and anger.

when the tears subsided, my face was red and swollen, but i could see again.

they washed away my human expectation and i could see with God’s vision.

ironic ~ we were on our way to a pastors conference that we had planned for and dreamed about, and all i could do was weep.

pastors give so much of themselves day in and day out… and the hope was to be poured into at the conference.

our expectations were so high, they were bound to be disappointed.

moms often feel that have to keep it all together ~ for the kids, for their spouse, for the sake of the family.

and pastors carry that same burden ~ for their congregation, for their leaders, for the sake of the church.
but sometimes, we all need to fall apart…

Selah having one of her many meltdowns…

and do note the sign in the background referring to the kids still in the children’s ministry,
“please pick up your children [pretty please with sugar on top]”
isn’t it ironic? 😉

the pastors conference was tough for our family.

the kids were homesick.

the girls wouldn’t go into their classes.
selah threw many a temper tantrum.

the schedule was busy and time ran thin.

it was difficult to glean from the conference, while balancing the needs of our family.

but God.

He is so good.

He taught me so much thru my kids that week…

He showed me so much thru the ‘random’ people we talked with…

He poured into us in ways we never expected.

in our weakness, God is strongest.

in our frailty, God shows His power.

in our disappointments, God reveals His plans.

in our weeping, we let go so God can work.

sometimes we need to attend a pastors conference…

and sometimes, we just need to fall apart.

Thank you for reading~feel free to comment, share and follow us on halfwritten records.

In Him, Leslie 🙂

Surviving our Family Vacation…

August 1, 20131 Comment

whew.
my family is just coming off the highs [and lows] of an epic trip – 26 days and 6,000+ miles of travel by 5 airplanes, 2 rental cars and 5 places we stayed, throughout Oregon and California.
we’ve been back almost 2 weeks, and I am still. tired.
seriously, I was so tired.
we were constantly on the go – seeing so many people, places and things.

it. was. awesome.
seriously, it was so awesome.
all the time we spent with people, places we went to, and things we did were awesome.

…and these are our stories of the stains, pains and gains of traveling across the country for 26 days.

travel is super fun. but it is also super hard… especially when traveling with 3 small kids.
it is taking your work with you 24/7. it is never getting a break. or downtime. it’s wiping butts elsewhere. it’s time out elsewhere. it’s losing count of how many times you turn around and say “stop fighting! keep your hands to yourselves! quit bothering your sister!” it’s not being able to separate the 3 bickering kids squished into a Toyota Camry rental car when they are used to slightly more space (at home) in the luxury of your own ’97 Honda Odyssey. it’s gritting your teeth and clenching your toes b/c your trying to force your 3 1/2 year old on the toilet and scaring her with your demon angry mom face without everyone in Powell’s bookstore hearing you yell underneath your breath at her to “GO POTTY!”…
as one friend coined the phrase: it’s parenting elsewhere.

it’s finding a tick on selah’s head during our picnic at the beach, smelling oil in the ocean as each wave brings a new whiff of the lovely odor, looking into the vast distance of the ocean, only for the view to be halted by the oil rigs doing their ‘job’. discovering the oil stains on their swim suits and bodies after we’ve spent hours playing in the water unaware of the results. the beach trips were some our favorite days, but there was always a little something to remind us nothing is perfect… even on the beach days that were close to perfect… like hearing them whine ~ “i wish the beach didn’t have so much sand! or “i wish the sand was grass!” really?! these kids.

it’s sneaking into the historical Santa Barbara Mission church service, feeling guilty about limbo-ing underneath the rope with a “service closed” sign attached. [well, soleil and i felt guilty… because we try and follow rules] so after a brief argument, we nonchalantly whistled our way under the rope. oh, and Adam walked right in and joined the communion line, no sweat. the usher telling him, “I’d never tell anyone they can’t take communion.” good job usher – you just affirmed my husband breaking all the rules. the Mission was built in 1786 and has been around a while, so i’m sure we’re not the first ones to have “broken in”.

then there’s selah yelling all the way up the hike to Multnomah falls, and all the other tourists giving me their pity – or ‘you’re a terrible mother’ – glances along the way. well, at least she smiled for the family picture. but only after i bribed her into doing so with the promise of ice cream. then there was our visit to Tillamook cheese factory where you can view the workers processing and packaging the cheese and other dairy products they are famous for. i don’t know about you, but i’m not really comfortable with a bunch of strangers staring at me while i work, packaging dairy products and passing them down a conveyor belt. so we quickly looked around, enjoyed some ice cream and headed for our last stop – the cheese sample line. we grab our toothpicks and start picking up the famous “squeaky cheese” when the lady behind me gasps pointing, “Ugh! SHE just put her used toothpick back in the box of clean toothpicks!” i mumble the response, “well… ummm, i’m not sure which 1 dirty toothpick out of the 300 in the box is hers…” so while she’s still staring at me expecting some kind of crazy reaction, i look at adam, shrug my shoulders and grab about 48 toothpicks of the top of the pile, hoping i got the right “dirty toothpick”. after we continued thru the sample line, and enjoyed our pepper jack samples – plus – the ones the kids didn’t finish, we both burst into laughter. what else can ya do?

not too far into the trip ~ our travel phrase became, “Well. they don’t have a Selah.”

hey, it made us feel better… at least temporarily.

and then the kids’ homesickness kicked in, missing their own beds and space, and the los angeles traffic – which we are pretty sure is the equivalent of time spent in hell – seriously?! a few of the highways had 8 lanes. 8 lanes people!?! and the impatience…, and the kids moving slowly, the length of time it takes to herd kittens, err… i mean, our kids out the door every single day… it takes forever to pack lunches, extra clothes, toys, and books, for whatever adventures awaited us each day…

intertwined in the midst of the stains and pains, were the beautiful gains…

the quality time spent as a family (we spent a lot of time getting along beautifully ;)).

the time without television, video games, and videos on our road trips (although at times we were wishing we would’ve had a video player to minimize some of the car drama)…

the time spent without unnecessary shopping, not going into a target the entire trip (and we love target!), minimal responsibilities and material things to keep track of, less toys to fuss over, wearing the same outfits over and over again…

the time spent hiking, waterfalls, the beach… everything outdoors!

experiencing church in different, unique places ~ the Portland Rose Garden, Crater Lake and the Santa Barbara Mission ~ on the sunday’s we were gone from our beloved home church.

the time with adam’s parents.

the coffee dates, and time to surf and boogie board while the grandparents watched the kids.

special memories our kids have made with their grandparents…

time with adam’s sister, our brother in law, and our neice and nephew.

the squeals of joy when our kids and their cousins embraced each other yet again… after a year apart.

time with my aunt and uncle who had just moved from oklahoma to california the same week we arrived.

visiting some of the area where adam grew up… the old Grananda hotel his grandfather owned… where rooms were once rented for a few dollars a night are now upwards of $400 a night.

time with adam’s aunt and uncle… whom we had not seen in over 12 years, and it was their first time meeting our kids.

the kids running chasing enjoying uncle gilberts farm, the animals and adventures to be had.

and hearing the wonderful family stories our aunts and uncles shared… history lessons of our family tree.

the laughter. the joy. our hearts swelled full of time with our loved ones…

creating memories. priceless moments made. to be held forever in our hearts.

much of our travel time had a stain or pain ~ and ultimately a gain ~ attached… and we are learning this is all part of the reality of hard core traveling as a family: fighting, yelling, frustrations, miscommunication, impatience, difficult conversations, deep work thru some tough emotions…

it’s the reality of the fam~glam(orous) travel lifestyle.
and yea, we’re crazy… we survived our family road trip… and we’ll do it all again…

thank you for reading… as always feel free to comment, share and follow us our half written records. and be sure to visit the blog again soon for my next post about our experience on the second part of our Oregon / California journey when we attended the Vineyard Pastors conference in Anaheim!

In Him, Leslie

church ladies

June 11, 20134 Comments

on sunday night, i was having a chat with a few of our church ladies ~ {aka} ladies who attend our church.
we were gabbing and cackling as typical church ladies do, and eventually the conversation landed on my transparency.

well, thank you very much. i do like to speak the truth, and i am happy to accept that label.

my transparency came up when one of the ladies shared a story about running into our family one saturday evening at a restaurant a few years back, where we were having dinner with a few other church peeps. she and another friend were leaving the restaurant, when we started blabbing about about church the next day, and how during the service we were going to have a “renew your vows” ceremony, blah blah blah. it was near valentines day {another reason for this fabulous idea}. then we said, “see you tomorrow at church”, as we always do to anyone we chat with on a saturday night, because we always expect people to show up to church on sunday morning!

it’s what we do! it’s our job! we’re a pastor and his wife for cryin’ out loud! we expect people to show up at church!

but here’s the deal-io…

these church ladies didn’t show up at church the next day. they are single gals… and the last place they wanted to be was at a vow renewal ceremony during the church service. tooootally understandable.

now honestly, i don’t remember them not being at the service… but what i do remember is that adam and i renewed our vows that morning, along with a few other couples, and my outfit was awful!

so on this sunday night, i told the church ladies ~ i don’t remember your not being at church that morning, but i do remember my outfit was really weird. and it was. the skirt was too long. the shirt was too red. and the sweater was all wrong. i was also in the skin of my “two months after having my third baby body”, and not fully comfortable even walking down the aisle to renew my vows. not to mention my husband {aka} awesome pastor of the church, was giving the vow renewal ceremony. sooo… he was standing on the stage, while i was awkwardly standing a few steps below him, for most of the ceremony, surrounded by couples holding sweaty hands, foreheads pressed together, looking deep into one another’s eyes.

sure. it was all very romantic. but my outfit was all wrong.

aaaand… if i still had a picture of what i wore, i would post it smack down on this blog.

but i don’t… i’m fairly sure i threw away the picture.

as i shared this outfit dilemma with the church ladies, they started laughing at me and said, “that’s what i love about you ~ your transparency.”

i just smiled and laughed out loud {ya know, LOL}, as i typically do when i make others laugh. i think comedy is one of my spiritual gifts, because even if no one laughs at my comments, jokes, facial expressions, gestures, or hand signals,… i am perfectly content still believing i am hilarious.
as our conversation(s) went on and on and on, and rabbit trailed all over the place, as any conversation i am involved in will do, we shared more life stories with one another and my heart soared. i was humbled and honored in my quiet of my soul.

these church ladies choose to share their lives with me. they love my transparency.

and if i’m really being transparent… then honestly, you should know most of the time i’m thinking ‘i don’t know what the heck i’m doing as a pastors wife.’ but i know i am called by God to do this. so i keep going.

even on the days i get discouraged, on the days i believe lies from the pit of hell, on the days i allow my brain to be so wrapped up in theological thought knots… i keep going.

when God’s sweet whisper and these church ladies remind me…

we love your transparency.

we serve a God of transparency. He knows all. He searches all. He sees all. He wants all.

He knows me. He searches my heart. He sees right thru me, into my transparency. He wants my transparency.

i want to leave you with Psalm 39 ~ my prayer is for it to encourage you to be transparent. be who God fully created you to be. if you are unsure, ask God and wait for Him to reveal ~ without comparing to anyone around you physically or virtually. walk in the fullness of who God designed and created you. to. be.

as always, feel free to comment on, follow and share this blog! In Him, Leslie 🙂

Psalm 139

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

¹You have searched me, Lord,

 and you know me.

²You know when I sit and when I rise;

 you perceive my thoughts from afar.

³You discern my going out and my lying down;

 you are familiar with all my ways.

⁴Before a word is on my tongue

 you, Lord, know it completely.

⁵You hem me in behind and before,

 and you lay your hand upon me.

⁶Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,

 too lofty for me to attain.

⁷Where can I go from your Spirit?

 Where can I flee from your presence?

⁸If I go up to the heavens, you are there;

 if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

⁹If I rise on the wings of the dawn,

 if I settle on the far side of the sea,

¹⁰even there your hand will guide me,

 your right hand will hold me fast.

¹¹If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me

 and the light become night around me,”

¹²even the darkness will not be dark to you;

 the night will shine like the day,

 for darkness is as light to you.

¹³For you created my inmost being;

 you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

¹⁴I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

 your works are wonderful,

 I know that full well.

¹⁵My frame was not hidden from you

 when I was made in the secret place,

 when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

¹⁶Your eyes saw my unformed body;

 all the days ordained for me were written in your book

 before one of them came to be.

¹⁷How precious to me are your thoughts, God!

 How vast is the sum of them!

¹⁸Were I to count them,

 they would outnumber the grains of sand—

 when I awake, I am still with you.

¹⁹If only you, God, would slay the wicked!

 Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty!

²⁰They speak of you with evil intent;

 your adversaries misuse your name.

²¹Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord,

 and abhor those who are in rebellion against you?

²²I have nothing but hatred for them;

 I count them my enemies.

²³Search me, God, and know my heart;

 test me and know my anxious thoughts.

²⁴See if there is any offensive way in me,

 and lead me in the way everlasting.

Half Written Records

Our stories, God stories, Heaven meets earth stories

Category: God

9/11 – never forget.

summer’s over… suck it up and go back-to-school.

sometimes we need a pastors conference… and sometimes, we just need to fall apart

Surviving our Family Vacation…

church ladies

Psalm 139

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

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Psalm 139

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

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